aloha mon amour..

well...all things considered, good ol ET has gotten the better of me one more time in terms of sweethearts...he was always in the PL mode, that was a given, couldn't be himself in any regard especially the doting fancier but he was nice in a lot of little ways that I now regret being a part of because august 20 was the last I heard from him and then he 'lost his cell phone'...and though he knows where I live, he hasn't been by or been in touch and it's now going into November so I know that we must be through...it feels like a veryheavy heart I have and I'm going away in a few days for a little teeny vacation and I don't have any precious thoughts to carry with me other than what I read on his facebook posts and who knows if that's him posting or 'her' representing  herself as him because I once asked him to 'friend' me so we could talk and he said 'I'd have to go all the way down to the senior center to use the computer...like he didn't do that??' himmmm...hmmmm... lacuna is being held for me at the library and librarian said there wasn't a notice on her page when I checked out my movies today so will have to drop back by there again and get that ..I don't like barbara kingsolver as a writer, thoughts all over the page as though she had every intention of confusing the reader and underwear likes her so that's another reason as underwear is totally dosshell orientated..and I had to GP firsthand this noon as though every speck of dust in the place were causal to her being in my car..mud spots and all, confusion and chaos in the order of the house...where to go what to do..just sold tee shirts to two tourists...they'll be up and about wearing our local gear from b.ham they are...do I miss the crabby one that had the nice smile and wandered into the room in  his hawaii shirt looking fine?  yep...I think I could just drop by and say hey but he's been heavily et'd to the point where well...probably it isn't safe and yeah I could move to maui to live near my son but would I ever see him either?  not much I'd gather, good ol et has it in hand that we're to be the dna splicing elements for whatever tf she wants in a day...I don't see her purpose or why that is but I miss my special someone greatly and it's been months since I was in  his company although yes he wasn't demonstratively affectionate and yes he was at least brusque if not scarily so...walking the line of reality and what I perceived as our true course together I now know why it was not to be because et had the upper hand and control of the body itself but not the spirit he was always there in that and I don't know what will become of my heart as I gave it to him in one moment in May and he kept for a while and yes I was pretty concerned even then that et would ride it out like the spawning salmon going up the river just herds of bogus intent there and a funny smell always in the house ok so...always have to be with someone, in love with someone and now there's no one and I've let him go...because et is at my very door and keeps that from me...

weirdnesses

this all began saturday morning when I was chopping onions...fellow club member gets cellphone call and remarks, "Bob's eyeball fell out, I have to go..." with the sort of nonchalance that such a comment definitely does not bring with it...HUH? I thought
then yesterday a 5 am call when I'm snoring my deepest snores, "need your help" voicemail as in to vaccuum and so forth so I think 'when I wake up' but no it's an urgent call prompted by extreme pain..and I only got that after some discussion with the party in question...so, fogs big time in and my usual fren...who can't move around much without shuffling...has 'loaned money' to someone who's now taking care of the household chores so my little bit of scratch has developed its own flea...again I should say, this has happened before and maybe the fren will be bitching about how the loanee has not done her duty and that's why the house is a wreck (she wouldn't be doing the dishes, the shuffler)...anyways...don't know what to do about all of this, try to remain above it and get my art show on the walls and remain calm and so on and so forth but when you sit in church every sunday with the actual perpetrator good ol mickey mouse himself with glasses and a fat butt and a puss well...why not, so I thought so I did...
anyways, I'm outta here for now...back to this another time maybe friday afternoon dunno...time's short, have to make supper for the painer... 

went to see the hugger again

yep..I did and my darn car broke down right at the old Wilson house just before the Hoko Bridge so that was a bummer...going to see Gary F about it right now, see what's the diagnosis...always worry about that because my funds are so limited but it has to be what it has to be...that's the way the cookie crumbles and so on...I guess I don't know what I'm doing in terms of being realistic about 'the hugger'...he really holds me tight and he's so hampered in his ability to communicate himself...ah..he was the darling when he got in yesterday...I was early..and he popped in the bedroom in his Hawaii print shirt, blue and white very very handsome...and I think he has the personality to go with it but that darn Hollywood ethic thing going, it's really tiresome...so anyway...we did waht we did and he fed me some excellent salmon dip...late in the night while we watched the television..says his cable is off because he isn't paying bills because he hasn't caught any fish...I suspent thats a CT thing...like the little putz sitting outside the VC today...interfering with the smooth operation of things because he's been 'rattled'...we'll see...off to see Gary now..I'll miss FOJ tonight because haven't any wheels and hopefully I get them back...soon...meanwhile...what it is is what it is...
sigh...I guess I love this guy and he's going to marry me...when we get hollywood off our backs...hehe

sore back

well, sitting here in front of the keyboard seeing how quickly my fingers can fly over the keys.  haven't heard from the 'sweet one' since last Wednesday which I don't take as a bad sign but then again I can't say that it's really good...Went to b'ham to see the kids, it was fun and I was tired last night from driving home.  Helped clean up the vining street house, it was littered with the bits and pieces of the residency...plugs didn't work for vacuuming, kept falling out of the wall so had to sweep the rooms which was a chore being as my back is very sore from labeling and stocking at the CoOp...went on a run around lunchtime 3-person car accident called out the second rig for it which Angie and I were going to get out to the scene in...as it turned out they fit everyone in the first rig so they didn't need us for that so I got back to the Sekiu Center in time for lunch which was on Barbara as she'd brought along two packages of Chicken Flavor Top Ramen..always good for a noodle soup is Top Ramen..so had that then swung by the Quarter Store to see what was new, got a good yellow sweater which puts more at home on the 'done with' pile, which seems to grow and to shrink as I sort it out...other than that, time to head on out of here for the rest of my day..

Gino the Circus Dog